Could someone please explain OES (Order of the Eastern Star) to me ?

by S & I

I joined OES because I was not allowed to join the Masons. I do not want to ask the people at the Chapter because they are like a bunch of sweet grandmas and I think I would hurt their feelings by asking these questions. The guys at Chapter don't really talk to me other than to say hi.

1. Do they just do the same thing every time ?

2. What is the beautiful part about the story of J and A ? J was a moron. Why did A have to pay for his stupidity ?

3.Why do they serve alcohol at Lodge and not at OES (I could have used a drink the other night at Chapter)?

4.Do they ever have guest speakers or anything remotely interesting ?

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Mar 17, 2012
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OES Answers for S&I
by: James

1. "Do they just do the same thing every time?"
Yes we do the same thing everytime, it is the way the OES is structured. Lodge also does the same thing everytime. Sometimes it may seem boring, however these things have to be done according to the by-laws. They also are done to help promote better understanding of the OES. Please hang in there.

2. "What is the beautiful part about the story of J and A? J was a moron. Why did A have to pay for his stupidity?"
This question I will try to answer where you may understand, as this part can seem to some disturbing. If you recall J made a solemn oath, and unfortunately A became involved after this oath. J, I am sure was heart broken because his oath ultimately cost him the loss of A. A loved J as well, however A knew that J must follow through with the committment that he had made. The beauty as I see it is that A stood there as strong as any person could under the circumstances demonstrating a heroic strength that most people could not ever imagine. Also I am sure that J would have probably thought that he was, in your words a Moron.

3. "Why do they serve alcohol at Lodge and not at OES (I could have used a drink the other night at Chapter)?"
I am not sure where you are from, but alcohol is not allowed in the lodges in our state.

4. "Do they ever have guest speakers or anything remotely interesting?"
We occasionaly have guests that speak, but usually it can be just the same old thing. I am not sure how long you have been a member, but you S & I can make the difference you seek. Talk to them, ask if there is something that can be done to make it more interesting, ie guests, special events, fund raisers, educational sessions, or anything that would be acceptable in the setting. The sweet grandmas that you think so well of, because you consider their feelings, will more than likely be overjoyed that you are interested, and can assist you in making it interesting. Please give it a chance, as ultimately the OES is all about you and your personal growth.

5. Bring up conversations with the guys as well, it is a two way street. It may take some time, but after they get to know you all will be fine. As for me Welcome, you are a valued member of th OES.

Mar 22, 2012
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Thank you
by: S & I

Thank you for your response James. I'm still not seeing the beauty of the story. All I'm getting so far is that it's noble to let your father kill you if he makes an idiotic promise.

I think I joined for the wrong reasons. Reason one was to make my grandmother happy. Mission accomplished but she is no longer living on the earthly plane. Reason two was to see if I could figure out why my husband became a mason. So far, all I can figure is that he enjoys being bored once a month.

I have a lot of great ideas to make OES more fun but a lot of them may kill off the long-time members :) I think I'd better quit before somebody gets hurt.

Mar 23, 2012
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S & I
by: James

S & I,
I wish I could explain further, however since this is an open forum, I do not have the liberty to do so.
I do thank you for being so honest. And I regret that I can't answer in a way that might make a real difference.
I also think that you are right, some things that would possibly make the OES and Lodge more interesting and enjoyable would give a few of the older members heart attacks. And I am talking of honorable events and ideas:)
As for figuring out why your husband joined lodge, that is only something he can answer. My reason for joining was to find out for myself what is was about, and that most of my hero's as a child and man were and are Mason's. As for being bored once a month at lodge, it is also a release, as when I go to lodge, I can forget about the problems of everyday life for just an hour or so. Also for me, lodge makes it easier to help with charity and helping our fellow human beings. And I totally believe that it has made me a better husband, father, and person.

To be totally honest with you I enjoy the OES, however the lodge is more dear to my heart. I am active in the OES probably because of my wife and daughter, and son-in-law. However I am proud to say that I am a member.

It saddens my heart that you will probably quit, but if you are not in it for your own "right" reasons, I fully understand. I wish you the absolute best, sister, and hope you find your answers.

I hope that you will be open and ask your husband why he joined. I think that he would be tickled to have the conversation.

S & I, I wish I could of been of more help, and please know that I have enjoyed trying to help find your answers! Please respond if you desire to, and best wishes.

James

Mar 24, 2012
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Thank you.
by: S & I

Thank you James. All the best to you and your family.

Apr 06, 2012
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Beautiful Order
by: Anonymous

How very sad you cannot get past your own ideas of being a moron. Adah was a powerful woman because god gave her the strength and courage to endure. We may never be expected to go through what these 5 heroines have been asked to do. But I find my own personal life is better because I have identified to them and have mirrored my life as they did. Obviously you do not have a strong religious belief or you would see this in these beautiful women.

Apr 09, 2012
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Beautiful Order by anonymous
by: James

This sister was looking for answers. Please review the teachings of the fifth point of the Star, and try helping her, instead of judging her. The fifth point reminds us to L___ O___ A____.

Sincerely your brother

Apr 10, 2012
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Thanks
by: S & I

Thanks for sticking up for me James. I do have strong religious beliefs. They just may be different than most people.

Jul 20, 2012
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astrotheology
by: Anonymous

Hi. Is there any way the stories of the 5 women could be explained with regard to astrotheology ? Perhaps then, I would truly understand the meanings and it would make the decision to quit or continue more clear.

Jul 22, 2012
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Astrotheology
by: James

Anonymous,
I am not sure that astrotheology can help explain the 5 star points or not. Rob Morris took the basic stories from the Bible, and used the 5 heroines for teaching the moral significance/lesson for each of the star points. Which bible, King James Version as an example, or perhaps another earlier version, he used I can not answer. I also can't say that he went back to an even earlier text or to theology that predates, either ancient or modern Christianty. What I can say is that the five heroines and their stories are contained in the Holy Bible. I personally do not believe that he used astrotheology for the the basis of any of the Eastern Star rituals or explanation of the moral lessons therein contained, only that the Bible was used. As for the Eastern Star, that reference is almost certainly directed to Christian beliefs. Please keep in mind, that the belief in a Supreme Being is a requirement for membership in the OES, but the members personal religious preference is not dictated. I hope this helps, and will try to answer further questions that you may have.

Jul 24, 2012
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astrotheology
by: Anonymous

Hi James. You know me as S & I. I'm trying to get this OES thing figured out so that I can make a more informed decision about quitting. I am beginning to believe that the bible is a coded story of the seasons and the planets with particular reference to the sun. Given that, I still haven't figured out astrologically why the woman in blue gets beheaded. Perhaps the blue represents Sirius and the chopping refers to it's position in reference to the earth during the winter.

OR, maybe each colour refers to alchemical elements . Blue for air. Yellow for earth. Green for water. Red for fire. White for ether. I would appreciate hearing your thoughts on this.

Jul 28, 2012
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Interesting concept, could be ????
by: Anonymous

S & I, I have never tried to make the connection of the colors in this way. I would have to study his (Morris) work more indepth to say absolutely one way or the other. Your choice for green as water is interesting. Considering the heroine and her story, I would have personally placed green with earth, as there was basically a revival of what appeared to have died, as an example grass and trees appear to die in the fall/winter and then with spring they re-emerge and are rejuvenated like they were previously.
I will have to contemplate the question further, and try to see if I can find any connections with the colors as you propose. Please don't think that I'm disagreeing with you, as I do respect where you are coming from. And you may have something here, that was lost along the way of the order from it's inception. Please check back and I will try to quickly research this and see what I can find. Best regards

James

Jul 29, 2012
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Thanks
by: Anonymous

Thank you James.

Aug 29, 2014
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Just quit your sexist club
by: Anonymous

The reason only grandmas are there is because they do not understand or care about the sexist nature of this club. This society was started in 1850 when women could not legally own property or enter into contracts without males validating them. In fact, women were considered to be property of their husbands. Hence, women cannot take binding oaths in Eastern Star without a male association or meet and do business without men being present. Eastern star's rules requiring male Masonic relationships have nothing to do with it being a family organization. If there are unequal alcohol requirements, this only proves the sexist antiquated nature of the whole organization. I would suggest that if you're interested in freemasonry, to join a co-Masonic organization where all the females aren't over the age of 80 and where women are treated equally. The unequal environment in the Masonic world will not ever change unless more women become fed up and reject inequality.

Oct 23, 2014
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Encouragement
by: Sis J

Dear S & I,

Please be mindful that this is an open forum and remember your obligation. After all, we are given the first token for good reason.

Having said that, I sure hope you decide to remain in OES because I have found it to be very interesting as I have progressed in the teachings.

Jun 15, 2016
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Sad
by: A Kept Woman

Sad to see this post. Although this is 4 years later I'm saddened by your "boredom" and lack of understanding. You can learn a lot from those " old ladies"I have been trying to find a way to become an ES for years but no blood line and I have no one in the chapters here in Dc Maryland VA area to nominate me. Here you are with this privilege and you're complaining and questioning irrelevant things. Good luck and God bless

Apr 25, 2017
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NO!
by: Anonymous

You should know better than to ask these questions online. I suggest talking to your Worthy Matron about your concerns. They are there for questions and guidance. Those "old women" you speak of will help you learn a lot. Perhaps if you wanted more excitement you would have been better off going Greek and joining a sorority. That's all I'll say.

Dec 15, 2018
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Trying to figure it out
by: Shawoody

I have been with OES for a year now and I still debate if I have made the right choice. It started off ok. The monthly meeting were all about learning, asking and answering questions. Lately, things have changed. A year in and I have not been taught all the passes, or important information. Women have been appointed to positions and no voting has taken place. There has not been a financial report since I've been in. I recently joined the Daughters of Sphinx. Now everytime I turn around there is a party!!!! I couldn't "Camel Walk as an OES, but now that I'm a daughter, I am allowed to. Go figure, I'm the same person, and all the other women are too! My husband has been a brother for about 10 years and he is also a Shriner. I must admit, I joined because I was very curious about something my husband was so involved in. I'm still trying to figure it all out. The "sisters" appear to be a bit cliquish" if you ask me. The only charity outreach that has happened in this year is a toy drive for kids at Christmas time. I do believe in God!I do belong to a church! I do read and belive that the Bible is the Word of God to govern my life. There is no organization that can change my beliefs. Thank God OES haven't tried.

Jan 29, 2019
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Needing advice to join or not to join
by: Anonymous

I have been reading all the online information the do's and don'ts of OES I'm very confused. My grandmother was an OES and I was a rainbow kid as I remember my grandmother and her friends was a happy group of women but then again I was only about 8-10 years of age. I have been contemplating about joining due to all of the bias and non-biased information one mainly that a true Christian should not join OES well I'm a Christian and I'm confused, what are the true beliefs of the OES? Is OES really or not what it says? Is OES a Christian belief and teachings.PLease explain. Thank you all in advance for your honest answers.

Feb 21, 2019
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Being a muslim ES
by: LightBright89

is the hinab allowed to be worn as an ES under the fez ..

how do you go about making a chamge to your chapter ??

Feb 23, 2019
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Being a Muslim in OES
by: Bob

That question would be best addressed to your local Star chapter.

Please be aware that, although Freemasonry welcomes Muslims, there is a segment of Islam which feels that Freemasonry is haram. That might extend to the OES as well.

Good luck.

Mar 28, 2019
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I dont know how I got here but..
by: Anonymous

I dont know how I got here but since I'm here. First things, I'm new to the OES & I had a very vague understanding of what it was. I also pledged Greek in college so I figured, its along the same line. I was nominated because I mentioned a long time interest from a college professor who gave me the vague understanding Nonetheless, I wanted to do it.
First things first, dont Google anything about OES. You'll find all kinds of stuff that's not necessarily true about the organization. Everyone is conspiracy theorists which leads me to point 2.
Just as you are being interviewed, interview the chapter. Go to the events to see how you feel with them, ask about the form of religion most of the chapter practices. So you dont commit being a Muslim and the rest of the chapter are Catholics. This is going to be YOUR commitment, so asking questions to see if it's worth your commitment shouldnt be embarrassing. Just dont ask questions about what things mean, etc. No one SHOULD answer it. Your goal is to see if the ladies would be your friend under any other circumstances.
3. Yes, it is a very traditional, gender role based organization. Which I dont necessarily agree with but I accept it because theres a greater purpose with my chapter. I can put my pride to the side to serve my community and it's really not that bad to finally experience what I was taught. I dont have to be a strong, independent woman for a few hours a month. And it makes me feel protected, finally (that's a whole other conversation).
4. I dont see any hidden meanings to the occult and if there are I just have to trust that God knows my intentions & understanding. I dont give that idea any life. Amen!
I think I just chose to be apart of a good chapter with a good solid foundation, so I think that before you commit yourself make sure that you can be a good sister to your sister with your sister. And that you're making a conscious decision to commit. Not because of your husband or to find a husband (please dont go looking for a husband, PLEASE & THANK YOU) or to be nosey. It's a commitment to serve yourself, your community and build an extended family. The key is finding a chapter where you can fit in to fulfill your commitment.

Apr 25, 2019
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Eastern Star
by: Anonymous

I also joined a local chapter of Eastern Star. Came from a family of Masons, and Shriners. I was a Rainbow Girl,also. What I have found is the chapter has lost many members. Either thru death, moving, or the fact that the members are quite cliquey. There are 2 main families in this chapter, and they let you know this is their chapter, and you are only a member because they needed members for financial reasons. The same members are in line, have the district appointments, and literally run the show. The only charity I saw was to themselves. All they concentrate on is the budget, and they will not last more than 2 years due to costs, rent...The older members are insulting to new members and call them out during a ceremony to belittle them. So much for loving kindness. They wonder why the new members do not become more active or wish to have offices that require memorization. I will tell you why, " they eat their young" I am now demitting from this unkind and uncharitable group of pious women .

Jun 03, 2019
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Eastern Star
by: Anonymous

TO Anonymous,
Your best thing to do is to go to your Grand Lodge/Chapter and report them. There is no need to have them in the order if they are not truly fulfilling the promises of the order. Also, see if you can go to another local chapter it may be best suited that you do or have the Grand chapter appoint you to a great district.

to anonymous about being bored and your husband. Yes I personally can find it boring, but I make it fun and entertaining because for my fellow ladies and I it gives us this sisterly bond. We talk every day and not just once a month.

We discuss what we don't know and how to improve on things there. Also we sometimes don't always have a lot of money but we pitch in where we can and we make sure that we have each others back.

Please do not google anything because it can lead you to be further confused and if you read your book it will give you the understanding. What your purpose is.

UNderstanding your purpose in Christ will help you understand the stories the passes and the determining factor of sisterhood. Ive been blessed to have a sisterhood and pray that you can do the same.

Jun 03, 2019
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Changed chapter
by: Anonymous

Thank you yes that is what I am doing. Demit from the chapter that lacks charity truth and loving kindness. Am going to stay in OES. but leave the prior chapter. and join a chapter that is active in the community and promotes OES values

Jun 23, 2019
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Charity is love
by: Anonymous

I just want to say charity is something a person does from their heart. You do not have to join any organization to be a charitable person. charity is love. it's that simple. reading the bible is love and life instruction. These 2 things combined with the teachings of OES make a dynamic woman. I know because I am that woman. Peace & love to all my Sisters in and out of the order.

Sep 18, 2019
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Sadden
by: Anonymous

I've been in OES for years live been in different Chapters because of my military obligation. Like it has been said before do not Google information on OES you will be confused. A lot of people have the wrong understanding about Eastern Stars we love the Lord God with all our hearts and we put him first before anything else. Pray about it ask the Lord for the understanding you seek he will show you. I'm thankful for my sisters sometimes we may not agree that happens with your biological brothers and sisters. You can only base your relationship with the Order on what you want out of it and what you put into it. Knowledge is power you must continue to read and study not just once a month.

Sep 20, 2019
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Proud OES Member
by: Anonymous

I have been an OES member for almost 2o years. I am not old, I am not the oldest member, but not the youngest. We have some in there early 20's. It is sad but there is some chapters that don't care for their members, don't want to help their new members or their elderly members.

Star is something that if you get the right chapter, you will really enjoy and grow in. But is also something you have to put the time in to learn the virtues of the star points, and what goes along with them. Star is a give and take, if you give you will receive from others.

Please do not read on the internet about what star is. I have read and it's not what people say. If you are in a chapter you have to be part of the group to make your chapter grow.

If you are in a chapter and not happy, find another one. There is one out there for you, that you will fit into perfectly.

Dec 30, 2019
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Past Grand Matron
by: Anonymous

I just want to wish everyone a happy 2020.😊

Dec 30, 2019
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What you make of it
by: PDD

I have been a OES member for years. My grandfather, grandmother, mother and uncle were all in star. My family has been a part of the Masonic family since my great great grandfather, and possible father back.

OES is something that you get out of it what you put into it. If you don't get to know your "sisters and brothers", learn your office, ask questions and volunteer for stuff you aren't going enjoy it.

These so called "grandma's" would be more that willing to teach you, just ask them. Lot of time it makes them feel important and needed.

If you are unhappy in your Chapter please find one you are happy in. It will bless your life for years to come.

Dec 30, 2019
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Different chapter
by: Anonymous

Happy new year to all. I have left a tribal negative and mean spirited chapter. This was not easy as everyone knows everyone and have found multiple members gossiping and giggling about false information in a ladies room This is the behavior I have and others have experienced. Now these chapters have about one year left. Why ? Because they drive out members that would have and could have contributed to the success of the chapters. These seasoned life long members have themselves to thank. Some may find an honest moment and look back at all the public harassing comments made. Often at an official visit certain members would take the microphone and laugh and ridicule officers This is not sisterhood of fraternal friendship. These are the reasons chapters are not successful or expanding. New members see this and just don’t return stating " life is too short to be treated in this manner ". I agree

Sep 02, 2020
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Bullies in OES
by: Anonymous

I cant agree with you more. I personally experienced the behavior that you have described. Being a bully has no place in the OES or any other organization. The associate conductress, and myself, the conductress left after the microphone incident. I tried to hang in there for another 6 months, but asked myself, Why ? Why subject oneself to this behavior. Lots of gossiping in the ladies room at chapter and also at line officer meetings. Since then joined a different chapter. Doubt that I will take an office or engage in the chapter as once did.

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Could someone please explain OES (Order of the Eastern Star) to me ?

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